Happy.

I was barely older than you when we found this little pup.

Her tail wouldn't stop wagging so she must've been happy

She was always stuck to my leg like a bootknife 

Never needed a lead, I knew she'd never leave

I was barely a man when I left her behind

and the years that past weren't always kind

She got so much older, started losing her sight

So I made more time and she held on alright

But things changed so fast and it's never seemed fair

that the day that she let go, I wasn't there

I loved her so much and without trying to be sappy

Every time I think of her, she can still make me happy. 

Another Day Goes By.

 Another day goes by. 

I'm waving away the flies from my eyes. 

Another errant year, avoidance turned to fear, 

Another day goes by. 

It's coming up again. 

I'm setting off alarms until they begin. 

I blink and then it's gone, it wasn't here for long 

but it's coming up again. 

Another day goes by. 

I'm cauterizing wounds until pain subsides. 

Another loved one lost, some uncalculated cost, 

Another day goes by. 

I'm waking up again. 

I'm brushing off the dust that had settled in. 

I'm born into a box, I've gummed up all the locks, 

To be waking up again. 

Another day goes by.

I can't remember any reason why? 

I watch them move along, wheels and cart and all, 

Another day goes by. 

I'm sorry for my thoughts. 

I'm sorry for the people who I led astray, 

I'm sorry for my words, I'm sorry if you've heard

but I'm sorry for my thoughts. 

It's hard not to feel like it's all your fault. 

Like you've pushed every person away. 

It's hard not to feel like you're the worst. 

And everyone's dying just to get away. 

Give it up, all of this pain. Give it to someone deserving. 

But who's more deserving than I? 

Give it up, it's not yours but the ones who abuse you. 

But why do they all have my voice? 

Why does the earth seem to tremble and quake? 

When do the heavens cry out for my sake? 

What does it matter if every voice

echo's the same refrain, "You, the mistake."

When is enough ever enough? 

Why did I push them away? 

When will I learn, when will I see? 

Tolerance isn't the goal, but the absence of pain. 

Any given 13th

In any given moment

at any given time

in any situation

I can disappear.

If I close my eyes tight enough

If I clench my fists both tight

I can turn my body transparent

and dissolve inside my mind. 

It doesn't take all day,

it doesn't require much energy

I can wish away my fears

and take away my pain. 

It's hard to see the future

when you're looking over your shoulder

Always worried some distant mistake

Is rearing for an attack

Remember me? They say to me

Furrowed brow in reluctance

Of course of course, how could I not

My cognizance is still within

It doesn't matter the quality

It only matters if there's content

How content is my contention? 

I'm almost out of wares.